Every time I get back on track, I feel like I feel differently than I felt previously. What I am feeling right now is not a new feeling. I am feeling like I can stick to this long term. I know how long this feeling usually sticks around, but I hope it keeps me company for a longer period of time. I hope that when I am knocked down... That this feeling helps me back up rather than leaving me to pull myself up alone. I am acting a little differently than I used to. I actually uploaded my photos to MFP. I plan to add a photo of myself to all of the weight loss support sites I am a member of. I think a large part of this journey is me accepting myself as I am today. I'm sure that will help with my social anxiety as well.
Speaking of my anxiety, it has been kicking my ass lately. Social situations seem to be harder than ever, and my general anxiety that I have at home is getting pretty bad. I've been on a crappy sleeping schedule due to it, and now that I am trying to fix that schedule, my anxiety won't let me sleep through the night. It woke me up two nights in a row. Thankfully, last night was easier than the night before. I'm going to keep trying to improve my schedule rather than letting the anxiety scare me into staying awake all night again. I also am going to work on going into more public places rather than waiting in my van for everyone to do what they need to. I just need to keep thinking positively and not allow myself to fall back into my bubble. I can't allow my fears and insecurities to rule my life.
Well, I guess that's it for now.
